In motherhood, Jesus over fig leaves.
I’d been feeling inadequate as a mother lately. My boys could do with a better mom. And I began to wonder what I could do to be a better mom.
More classes? More experiences? More activities? More structured learning at home? More books? More educational toys and knick knacks? More play dates? More what?
As I hashed it out with JE tonight, I was reminded — it’s simple and it’s fundamental. What my kids need the most from me is a godly mother. And these activities and things can’t cover up for my spiritual deficit.
I wonder if this is the deepest form of the very common “mama guilt”?
When I feel like I’m not doing enough, maybe the deeper, gnawing issue I feel is that I am not enough.
My impatience. My discontentment. My complaining. My harshness. My selfishness. My constant failure to be a loving, patient, sacrificial mother.
And in true, legalistic fashion, I think I can cover my shame with the fig leaves of more activities, more education, more things for my children. As if my doing more things for them will cover up my bankrupt being.
But I am not bankrupt in Christ. “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1) Jesus silences my mama guilt, because He makes provision for my failures and inadequacies as a mother.
There’s nothing wrong with fig leaves. Nothing wrong with kids’ classes, experiences, activities, structured learning, books, educational knick knacks, play dates, and the like.
But they are a poor cover up for a spiritually lacking mama.
So, Jesus for the lack — and these “fig leaves” as the fruit of a mother who is firmly planted in Christ’s sufficiency and provision .